“If you don’t go within, you are gonna go without.”
Dr. Nancy Irwin
I work with so many people who don’t have a clue what they want to do or be when they grow up. Many feel extreme frustration, especially since we live in a culture that trains us to believe that we are what we do. This can create a blindspot to seeing some of our own gifts. The truth is, we all have many gifts, and sometimes the simplest can bring the greatest satisfaction and sense of purpose.
I can’t remember a time when I didn’t feel horribly insecure…when there wasn’t a multitude of people I would rather be. My sister, my mother, a teacher, a cheerleader, a famous opera singer, a movie star….I felt life was really unfair that others should be so blessed with looks, brains, talents, gifts, and I was mired in boring mediocrity on all counts.
It took me years to discover that the easiest way to discover who you are and what you are really good at is to look within…..not looking at others for clues!
This is the beauty of meditation, prayer, and silence. The world is filled with frenetic suggestions of what you should be, have, do, what’s wrong with you, etc. This drowns out the only real truth: your own inner voice.
Turn off the TV and turn on your own life.
- Just start with 10 minutes a day…..5 if you are freaking out.
- Just close your eyes and breathe deeply and slowly…focus on all the things you are grateful for. I don’t care how sucky your life is right now, you have vision, legs, a home, a computer, enough money to eat, etc. Remember whatever we focus on expands…focus on your assets vs your deficits.
- This practice is guaranteed to build your trust in yourself. If you want to raise your self-esteem, you have to give your self a chance to introduce him/herself to you!
Here are five guidelines for honing in on your gifts:
It comes easily to you. You’d do it on your day off just for fun. (A designer who is always “beautifying” wherever he goes…he is happy to advise people when the clock is not running.)
It is rewarding and satisfying to you. It’s not work…it’s therapeutic. (A free-lance car washer who simply loves to see cars sparkle.)
- You are a “natural” at it. People come to you for help, information, service, product, or guidance on this topic. (An office manager who easily organizes tasks, schedules and benefits.)
- You may not even see this as a gift because you believe it “should” be hard. (A mother of nine who volunteers at an adoption agency.)
- You don’t understand when others have a much harder time doing the same thing. (A professional golfer who has no patience teaching his son how to swing.)
Notice all these came from a place of love…for beauty, clean cars, efficiency, children, a game.
What do you love?