There is a new concept in psychology whose time has come to relieve some of the political division and stubborn self-righteousness in our current culture: intellectual humility. (Psychology Today July/August 2023, page 38-44).
This dynamic is intended to offset the intellectual arrogance that is currently contributing to the chasm. When we refuse to listen to those with differing viewpoints, we operate from assumptions and close the door to new possibilities in critical thinking. We all have blind spots, and they are what keep us trapped in “The Certainty Trap”, that place we are 100% certain we are right and others are wrong.
“When you become comfortable with uncertainty, infinite possibilities open up in your life.”
– Eckhart Tolle
Tips to avoid falling into this trap are:
(1) Accept that many of us tend to think we know more than we actually do know. True awareness comes when we realize we don’t know what we don’t know.
(2) Remain curious. Albert Einstein, it is said, would listen to a child’s feedback; he discounted nothing, remaining open to simplicity and humility, asking open-ended questions and fairly receiving the responses.
(3) Listen patiently and debate vs argue. Perspective is everything, and you can only understand what perspective someone else has by listening respectfully to them.
(4) Expose yourself to others’ opinions/beliefs/thinking and give yourself time to process that information. Rarely are we required to refute or agree immediately.
(5) Hold a cooperative vs competitive mindset. Gather information by allowing others to contribute to your decision-making process vs wondering how you can prove them wrong.
No one likes to be wrong, or feel stupid. Angry, insulting, intimidating discussions on any topic generally have the opposite effect: they strengthen the defense, polarize, and only more strongly cement each party in their original position. The more we can relax and reflectively listen to others is a great step in building intellectual humility.
I recently heard a story in a professional seminar about a young man who applied to work in a low-level position at a company in Corporate America, with dreams of being the CEO there one day. When he was offered a minimum wage job in the mailroom, he told his interviewer he would only take the job on one condition: that his manager would criticize him every day. I suppose he instinctively had an intellectual humility and knew that the only way to improve and excel is to be open to listening to others who may know more. This disconnected his defense mode, and allowed him to move up the corporate ladder. Yes, he did indeed become the CEO there.
Easier said than done, but these next few months can provide a golden opportunity for us to tone up our intellectual humility muscles and allow clarity to emerge from chaos.
“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” – Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.