LOVE $TIMULU$ (Love on a Budget)

“I’ve never fallen in love…but I’ve stepped in it a few times.” Rita Rudner

While President Obama is stimulating our economy, take this time to stimulate your relationship…even on a budget. Valentine’s Day is a celebration of love, and that can be love for an intimate partner, or the self, or a child, or a cause. Love is love!

This year, many people are panicking about giving to their sweethearts while trying to maintain a budget, or not having that someone special to celebrate the day with, or resent having another overly-commercialized holiday, and more. Here are some suggestions — all for around $50 or less – – for simple yet real romantic gestures that are expansive rather than expensive:

If you are in a relationship:

Cook dinner for your mate, wearing nothing but an apron. You can even carry across that theme and dine with nothing on but napkins. Then give your partner a full one-hour body massage in a candlelit room, with his/her favorite music playing in the background. Burn some sensual incense. Have a bottle of wine or champagne with strawberries.
“Kidnap” your partner. Have a picnic of your favorite simple foods/beverages and dine on the beach, or in the woods, or on a mountaintop, or some placed away from the madding crowd. Take a book of poetry and read your favorite love sonnets to your honey. Better yet, write one yourself!
Order in your favorite take-out dinner and have a love story movie marathon. (“Love Story,” “An Affair to Remember,” “Casablanca,” “Gone With the Wind,” “Terms of Endearment,” “The English Patient,” “Moonstruck,” “Roman Holiday,” “Now, Voyager,” “Ghost,” “From Here to Eternity” “Sabrina,” “Funny Girls,” “The Graduate” “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner, ” “The Way We Were” “Sleepless in Seattle “to name a few classics).
Visit an elderly person who is widowed and allow him/her to talk about their spouse. You can take dinner to them, or take them out. Touching a lonely person like this can remind you of all that you do have…..beyond the material. Moments like these will stay with you long past the flowers or the candy.
Remember, the day may come when you CANNOT express your feelings to him/her. Take a risk and (as John Mayer says) “Say what you need to say.”

If you are single but looking for a relationship, re-ignite your self-love:

Treat yourself to a massage, a manicure/pedicure, or a facial.
Buy yourself your favorite flowers. When you buy a gift for yourself. When you do this, you are affirming your own value. The first step to attracting an ideal partner is to be your ideal self. Plus, you are guaranteed to like your own gift…no acting or pretending, so there are no hurt feelings!
Do something out of your comfort zone. Attend a singles party on Valentine’s Night and make it your mission to meet at least five new fascinating people. At the very worst, you’ll make new friends.
Make a collage of the type of mate you want to attract. Remember, we get whatever we focus on. So focus on the traits you do want in a relationship.
Write a love letter to that person. Sounds crazy, I know, but it’s actually calling them in to you. (“I can’t wait to meet you in real life and share X with you.” “I don’t know when we will meet, but I’m ready for you.”) You are unblocking any negative energy that is preventing your ideal relationship.

If you are just not into anyone right now and happily single, simply enjoy it:

You can easily inspire others with your contagious self-confidence and self-acceptance. Spend the evening with someone who is not happy about being single, and allow them to see what is good about being single. Some people get caught up in society’s expectations or statistics. You can help them be happier while they are attracting their ideal mate.
When you enjoy yourself, you give others permission to do the same. Go to a comedy club with the girls (or the guys).
Go a chick flick (or guy flick) or a party. Wherever you go, celebrate your joy in your gender and spread your fabulousness around like seeds for others. You are performing a good will service in all you do.
Send Valentine’s Day cards to friends and family members, just like you did when you were a kid.
Visit terminally ill kids in a hospital and take them cards or candy, or fresh-baked cookies, or toys, or perform for them.

Wishing you a Happy Valentine’s Day…..love it up!

Dr. Nancy