A Lesson from Travis Alexander

I got sucked into the drama of the ongoing Jodi Arias capital murder trial. If you haven’t been following it, the thrust is Jodi savagely murdered her ex-boyfriend, Travis Alexander, by stabbing him 29 times, shooting him in the head, and then slitting his throat from ear to ear. She has been found guilty, and is awaiting the sentencing decision: either life in prison or the death penalty by lethal injection.

At the time of the murder, Jodi and Travis were not a couple; they simply continued to be sexually involved. You could say this was a classic case of “Fatal Attraction,” as Jodi was clearly obsessed with Travis. My heart goes out to the family and friends of Travis, a sparkling young man who, I wish, could have said no to Jodi.

Travis, like many people, seems to have been deeply conflicted by his religious beliefs and his sexual desires, that he was vulnerable to the wiles of this highly sexualized young woman. A devout Mormon, he tried his best to uphold the tenet of no pre-marital sex, but alas, “caved” time and again with Jodi. Jodi, who more than likely has a borderline personality disorder, seems to have manipulated Travis her sexuality. Many borderlines display hypersexuality. They can be “freaks” in bed, because they have absolutely no boundaries. This was apparently Travis’ undoing.

Sadly, Travis knew Jodi was “bad news.” Just weeks before his murder, he ironically went on a rant, berating her, proclaiming that she was the worst thing that ever happened to him; he even told some of his friends and family members that he was afraid of Jodi. Yet, sadder still, he opened his door and bedroom to her one more time.

Let me hasten to say that I have never met Travis or Jodi and have not performed a psychological evaluation on either party, so this is simply my observation. However, in order to give Travis’ life and untimely death meaning, I fervently hope that those in a sexually addictive relationship will seek help and avoid the potential consequence that Travis, unfortunately, did not. Further, I would never say Travis was a sex addict per se. I believe he got caught up with an extremely sexual, deeply disturbed woman, and was unable to say no to her.

If you or someone you know is in a sexually addictive or obsessive relationship, please encourage them to get professional help before it is too late.

Rest in peace, Travis Alexander.